Breaking the Silence of Grief: A mum’s journey after the loss of her toddler turns trauma into healing

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I was recently acquainted with Sydney Northern Beaches Mum Jenny McGregor. Jenny suddenly lost her 18-month-old son, Jamie, to SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) in 2010.

Jenny turned to her passion of music for comfort whilst grieving for her son. Yet she was unable to find the solace she needed because she couldn’t find music written about or by people who had experienced the horrific tragedy of losing a child.

“I turned to music in my darkest moment but traditional love songs just didn’t ‘cut it’. I wanted to hear music that had come from the heart and soul of another grieving parent, someone who understood my pain. I wanted to know that I wasn’t alone and that there was a possibility of hope again,” Jenny explains.

It was through this need to heal, to connect, and to live through the trauma that Jenny started to write songs to work through the devastation that came from the death of Jamie. Music became her solace and part of Jenny’s healing.

Through Jenny’s work as a Clown Doctor for The Humour Foundation, Jenny sadly knows first-hand that losing a child is not a rare thing, and that many others have been through the same grief. Many live silently with the memory of a child lost too soon.  It’s these other bereaved parents, and their extended family of aunts, uncles, grandparents, siblings, and friends, whom she hopes to help.

Jenny’s mission is to produce an album of music for other bereaved parents and their families, to help in the grieving process.

“Death is still such a taboo topic but it’s something that needs to be talked about openly and explored, in order to assist with the natural, grieving process. I hope that music can be a way to express and release that grief as a catalyst for healing.”

Jenny’s started a Kickstarter campaign which aims to raise $25,000 to professionally produce and share an album of 12 songs with bereaved parents. In order to help those who need it most, Jenny is creating the album so that Red Nose can giveaway the album for free to all parents who access Red Nose services. Jenny chose the charity as it provides free support services to families devastated by the death of a child.

Red Nose helped Jenny and her husband considerably through their darkest hours.
Her music will also be available for sale, with 100% of all proceeds going back to Red Nose.
The Kickstarter campaign page is Love and Let Go (An Album for Bereaved Parents). The campaign started on Thursday 20 July 2017 and ends on Friday 18 August 2017, so you need to be quick to help Jenny and similar bereaved parents.

Since the launch, the project and Jenny’s story has resonated with many people. She has received messages from bereaved parents and families who have thanked her for the opportunity to break the silence of grief.

“I am so grateful to so many people for sharing this project, and I’m so thankful for the messages of understanding and support that I’ve received from other bereaved parents and families. I hope that together, we can get the word out further, and that we will hit our target of $25,000 on 18 August.”

With only 10 days to go on the Kickstarter campaign, funding has reached $16,895, so still another $8,105 to go to reach the $25,000 target,  Jenny’s will only be funded if it reaches its target otherwise Jenny’s project won’t go ahead.  Jenny has been working tirelessly to get this project off the ground, so with your help Jenny will be able to achieve her goal.  There are many options available from making a small donation to $10 for one digital download of a song to $30 for a download of the entire 12 song album.  I especially like the $500 or more option where Jenny will write a song especially for you, or a loved one of your choice, alive or passed.

“This album is a legacy to my son, Jamie. It has been a part of my healing, and if it can help just one other person heal, then it has been completely worthwhile.”

 

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Nicole Cassey

written by

Nicole Cassey

Nicole Cassey, Mum to Jacob and Emily, founder and general dog’s body at Bubbaroo. Nicole was inspired to create Bubbaroo and Australia’s first swaddle after the personal experience she had with her first child, Jacob.

Nicole explains "It is such a steep learning curve becoming a parent. Getting to know the baby you created and finding your groove as a parent. You sometimes feel like you need to become a detective to try to interpret your baby's cues, personality, cries and behaviour. This is my passion to help parents on their journey, especially new parents as they transition to parenthood."

Nicole has a passion for sharing knowledge and community, regularly organising and presenting at various expectant parent and sleep workshops. Nicole ensures she is up to date with the latest evidence-based safe sleep and health research. Bubbaroo collaborates with experts in their field that share similar values and philosophies and have a passion for helping and supporting parents and expectant parents.

Nicole’s attention to detail with the creation of her premium quality baby, toddler and child sleepwear is exceptional. Nicole has been committed to ensure that Bubbaroo is not just a mass market brand producing products, Nicole’s focus is on helping your baby sleep safely in products that stand the test of time.

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