Table of Contents
- How to Get Ready to Toilet Training Your Toddler
- Wait Until They Seem Ready
- Nappy Free Time Helps Toilet Training
- Potty or Big Toilet?
- What to Wear During Toilet Training
- Monitoring for Signs of Action
- Expect Accidents
- Don't Use Force or Bribery for Toilet Training
- Toilet Talk
- Don't Expect Your Child to Be Dry Overnight
Toilet training! A huge milestone in your child’s life that’s for sure. Not to mention a milestone for the parents too!
A friend of mine is currently training her 2 year old and I can’t believe how excited she is about it! It’s like a whole a new world without nappies and all the other stuff you have to lug around in your ‘nappy bag’.
Sure it’s scary letting your toddler roam the house sans nappy, but it’s all part of the journey. Here are our top tips for toilet training your toddler…
How to Get Ready to Toilet Training Your Toddler
Before you actually start training, make sure that your child is exposed to the toileting scenario. Let your toddler watch Mum or Dad in the bathroom. Maybe they’d like to practice flushing the toilet too. They need to see how things work so that they can model your behaviour, as is the case in other areas of life! This makes it all more familiar and a natural progression when your toddler is ready to start the ‘real training’.
Try reading books about toilet training with your toddler. Be sure to use the correct anatomical names for body parts from the beginning. This shows your toddler that body parts are natural. Silly names might make them feel that these parts are something to be embarrassed about. Using the correct terminology displays a positive body image and can open communication for discussions about their bodies as they grow older.
Wait Until They Seem Ready
There is no right time to start toilet training. Every child will be different. Many children do start showing signs of readiness between 18 months and 3 years of age. You might have a few false starts but this is part and parcel of toilet training! Sometimes parents start toilet training too early. They are so keen to get their child out of nappies that they try to rush the child along. Sometimes this can elongate the process. When your child is really ready, hopefully they’ll nail it pretty quickly.
Here are some common signs your child is ready:
- trying to copy mum or dad or other kids going to the toilet
- hiding to pee or poop
- waking up dry from a nap or having a dry nappy for longer than usual
- pulling at their wet or dirty nappy
- actually telling you they have just done a wee or poo
Nappy Free Time Helps Toilet Training
Many people often like to time their training to coincide with the warmer months of the year so they can ditch the clothes and the disposable nappy. If your child is still wearing a nappy during the day then they will not feel wetness after they pass urine and therefore won’t associate the need to start using the toilet.
During the warmer weather your child can initially spend some time outside (on the lawn if you have some) and become accustomed to not wearing a nappy and see what happens when they do a wee. The warmer weather also means that they are wearing a lot less clothes. It is much easier to remove a little pair of shorts or lift a light dress than trying to take off jeans, socks etc in the cooler months. Think about your timing but don’t feel restricted by the weather. Just see if it will work for you.
Potty or Big Toilet?
Getting your hands on a little potty that’s just the right size can help with the toilet training process but is not essential. A cute little pint size potty may work for your child and is a very popular option. Just remember that you will need to clean it every time and take it with you if you go out. By using a potty, it means that your child will have to tackle another step in the toilet training process. They will need to move to the “big” toilet at some point.
I personally was not interested in emptying the potty every time and cleaning up. So I opted for the insert that goes under the regular toilet seat. It stops their little bodies falling through! It can also help if they have a little step stool to climb up to the seat. These are easily obtained from somewhere like IKEA. A stool puts their legs in a good position when having a bowel motion. Using the adult size toilet was a little less daunting when we were out and about since they had become accustomed to using one at home.
Luckily places like day care and playgroups have suitable child size toilets that can make the experience easier for your child. You may need to consider minimising certain outings while your child trains to help make it easier. I’m not saying change your life, just reconsider where and how long you stay out. 2 hours at the shopping centre might not be ideal!
What to Wear During Toilet Training
It’s really important to get some buy in from your toddler when starting toilet training. Why not take your toddler to the shop to choose their new underwear. Favourite characters and colours can all assist with their enthusiasm for toilet training.
Try to keep the use of nappies to a minimum once you start training. Continuing to use nappies during “training” is a common mistake and can confuse your child. Disposable nappies whisk away the moisture and inhibit your child feeling the wetness that comes with toileting. If your child cannot feel the moisture, they will not understand what is happening. This can delay the toilet training process considerably. Where possible, minimising long or stressful activities during toilet training can help with the process. Being at home, day care or relaxed places such as the park or play group will be most helpful to your child.
Monitoring for Signs of Action
It will be very helpful to the process if you are able to spend a lot of time with your toddler during “training”. It’s a bit like watching for tired signs in a baby. You might notice your child move away, pause or making a particular facial expression. This is the time to gently guide your child to the toilet. Taking your child to the toilet every 1.5 to two hours is ideal. You also need to ensure that your toddler is drinking lots of water to assist the process.
Expect Accidents
So you think you’re done and dusted. Believe me when I tell you that there’s 99% chance you’ll have an accident sometime. It’s completely normal. If your child is having more success in making it to the toilet than not, then you are on the right track. It is normal for children to continue to have the odd accident in their pants or to not quite reach the toilet in time.
If you are finding that you are having more “accidents” than successes, then you will need to weigh up delaying training for a little bit longer to make sure your child is truly ready.
If your child does have an accident, be sure to stay positive and not let your child see your disappointment. If you are finding the whole process frustrating, then have a little break and try again soon.
Don’t Use Force or Bribery for Toilet Training
You need to stay in charge here parents! Make toilet training fun and your child will be more cooperative. If you use bribery, your child will have some power over you and it will be difficult to get back. You do not want to reward or punish your child for this activity since. Just keep it normal, like when they learn to walk and talk.You can certainly make a fuss, give them a high five or tell them to call a grandparent and share their news. Just steer clear of prizes. Some kids also don’t like a fuss being made when they achieve something so in that case, keep it as low key as possible.
Toilet Talk
Remember to keep toilet talk positive but stay in charge. If you ask your child if they would like to go to the toilet then you’ll probably get a “no” answer. Instead, tell your child that it is time to go to the toilet and gently guide them there. This allows less room for defiance – a common characteristic of a toddler!
Don’t Expect Your Child to Be Dry Overnight
Some kids get the overnight thing around the same time they start becoming regular on the toilet. This is very often not the case though, so be prepared for overnight training to take a little longer and more often than not a lot longer than day time toilet training. Remember that all children are different and will progress with toilet training at different rates.
Toilet training at night can be especially challenging if your little one has moved to a big bed. One idea is to not use disposable nappies or pull-ups as they keep your child really dry after weeing. A cloth nappy will help them feel the sensation of being wet and will eventually wake them up. The idea being that your little one will eventually recognise the association and wake before they need to wee!
If you are toilet training a child with special needs you might like to use this website with specific suggestions from Paediatricians: Healthy Children
Do you think your toddler needs to stop using their dummy? Whilst we wouldn’t recommend banishing the dummy at the same time as toilet training, you might like to read our Bubbaroo blog “How to Get Rid of the Dummy”.