When my first baby Jacob was born at 41 weeks, he came out screaming his lungs out and he just didn’t stop. He was a terrible feeder. At every feed, he’d fuss, shake his head, gulp air, get painful wind, and then vomit. Sometimes I wondered if he’d kept any of my breast milk down at all.
We stayed in hospital for five days after his birth, and Jacob only just maintained enough weight for us to be discharged. But once we were home, things didn’t improve. His distress and breast fussiness escalated. He wasn’t gaining weight, and I was becoming increasingly anxious.
I didn’t know what a “normal” amount of crying or spitting up was. But I knew in my gut that something just wasn’t quite right.
At around five weeks old, I made an emergency appointment with the paediatrician. He was initially concerned by Jacob’s weight and distress. He ordered blood tests and an ultrasound to rule out pyloric stenosis. When those came back negative, Jacob and I were both admitted back into the private hospital for observation and to see the hospital lactation consultant.
That’s when the comments came.
One of the most devastating moments was during our inpatient stay, when the lactation consultant watched me trying to feed my tiny, unsettled newborn. Without compassion or context, she snapped: “You CANNOT feed this baby.”
I broke down in tears, completely overwhelmed, physically recovering from birth, emotionally drained, and now questioning my ability to nourish my own child.
After our discharge, things went from bad to worse. Jacob couldn’t keep milk down, screamed in pain, and was barely sleeping. After eight weeks of relentless distress and sleep deprivation, Jacob stopped waking up altogether. He was lethargic, frail, and still unable to feed properly.
I was beside myself with worry. I called doctors, tried to get in to see a private gastroenterologist—no one could see us. One Thursday evening, my husband walked in from work and I said, “We’re going to emergency—now.”
We drove straight to the emergency department at our local children’s hospital, where the ER doctor took one look at Jacob and admitted him immediately.
And that’s where everything changed.
Finally Heard
The Doctors, Nurses, and Lactation Consultants at the children's hospital were extraordinary. They recognised Jacob was in severe pain. They diagnosed him with Gastro Oesophageal Reflux Disease (different to Gastro Oesophageal Reflux "GOR") so advanced his oesophagus was ulcerated. He was started on Omeprazole, a proton pump inhibitor that finally gave him some relief.
I was presented with feeding options, including inserting a nasal gastric (NG) tube. But I didn’t want that for Jacob. I wanted to breastfeed. And for the first time—I was supported.
My milk supply was never the problem. The problem was that Jacob simply couldn’t keep anything down.
The hospital team worked with me to find a solution for Jacob's severe GORD. We tried a supply line, but it overwhelmed Jacob—he was getting too much milk at once. In the end, finger feeding proved to be the breakthrough. Jacob could sit upright and slowly feed on my expressed milk. It worked. He finally started to heal.
The Lesson I’ll Never Forget
Looking back, I realise I knew all along that something was wrong. My gut had been screaming it for weeks—but I let myself be dismissed, doubted, and undermined by professionals who didn’t listen.
Even when the paediatrician finally diagnosed Jacob with GORD, he brushed it off with, “Acid is overrated.” It made me feel invisible again—like I was being overdramatic.
But I knew. And that experience taught me the most important lesson of motherhood: your instinct is powerful. You must trust it.
The Science of Maternal Instinct
What we often call "gut feeling" isn’t fluffy or imagined—it’s rooted in neuroscience. During pregnancy and postpartum, your brain undergoes physiological changes that heighten sensitivity to your baby’s cues. Hormones like oxytocin rewire your brain to be attuned to subtle shifts in your baby's needs.
This is what gives mothers that uncanny ability to just know something is off before anyone else sees it. It’s biology. It's powerful. And it's valid.
The Double-Edged Sword of Social Media
When I was going through all of this with Jacob, social media wasn’t really a thing. And that was both a blessing and a curse.
On the one hand, I wasn’t inundated with filtered images of perfect mothers and miracle babies. I had room to listen to my gut without the background noise of a thousand opinions.
But it was also incredibly isolating. There was no online community to turn to in the middle of the night. No Instagram stories reminding me that I wasn’t alone.
Today, mothers have access to a wealth of information and support at their fingertips—but they also face more pressure, more misinformation, and more comparison than ever. Social media can be a tool, but it should never be your compass. Your gut should be.
Bubbaroo Was Born From Instinct
Out of that dark and challenging time, something beautiful emerged. Jacob’s startle reflex was so severe it disrupted every attempt at sleep. I couldn’t find a swaddle that truly supported healthy movement while keeping him secure. So I created one.
The Joey Pouch Swaddle was born from experience, love, and instinct. With a bell-shaped design for healthy hips and breathable 100% natural fabric, hypoallergenic materials, it was crafted to meet the real needs of babies and their mothers.
That swaddle became the first of many Bubbaroo baby sleepwear essentials — from transitional swaddles to baby sleeping bags that grow with your child through every sleep stage. Bubbaroo exists because I refused to ignore what I felt. I want every mother to feel that same empowerment.
Mama, You’ve Got This
To any mum reading this who is doubting herself: Pause. Breathe. Tune out the noise.
You are not too anxious. You are not too dramatic. You are not failing.
You are the expert on your baby.
And your instinct? It’s your superpower.
Trust it.
Always.
Signs of GORD in Newborns:
Excessive crying and irritability after feeds
Poor weight gain or vomiting
Arching back during or after feeding
Refusing feeds
- Persistent irritability, pain or distress
Sleep issues due to pain